More and more funnies.. vol: something...

[George Wallace]

Say no more:

 

[George Wallace]

 

[The Bread Guy]

New boss, kinda-sorta like the old boss ...

 

[George Wallace]

Maybe not so funny after all.....Hmmmmmm?

 

[George Wallace]

LOL!....Carbon Tax.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLaiZPQTxC0

 

[dimsum]

This Hour has 22 Minutes with MND Harjit Sajjan at Toronto Fan Expo, with a cameo by 450 Sqn:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2o9QBkLMXw

 

[Rifleman62]

Not particularly funny in the circumstances ....

5 Times a Ship's Anchor Got a Little Carried Away

http://www.popularmechanics.com/adventure/g2783/5-anchors-that-got-carried-away/?mag=pop&list=nl_pnl_news&src=nl&date=093016

 

[s2184]

This appeals to my twisted sense of humour.  ;D 

Lol

 

[George Wallace]

Reproduced under the Fair Dealings provisions of the Copyright Act.

Gritty Kingston Police horse transferred to desk duty while Internal Affairs investigates
19 HOURS AGO by ALEXANDER HUNTLEY

KINGSTON – The Kingston Police horse known for bending rules and not taking any shit has been transferred to administrative duties while the Department’s Internal Affairs investigates her conduct. This comes after a video was released showing the mare kicking a Queen’s student after she was slapped from the behind during Queen’s Homecoming last weekend.

‘Murney’, a seven-year veteran who started in narcotics before switching to crowd control, had a strong reputation for her rough-and-tumble approach to dealing with suspects. She was known for being disobedient to superiors, working long hours, and shitting all over the street, but earned the respect of fellow officers for solving some of the most elaborate cases.

“She was tough as nails,” said her partner Constable Greg McCabe. “And had one strong left-hoof and could catch any perp who was on foot or bicycle. What I liked about her was her refusal to use her taser or gun, and just trample. You know, old fashioned police work.”

Despite her popularity with her co-workers, her superiors were not impressed with her behaviour. The 8 foot equine was previously investigated for skimming apples from a drug bust in 2012, but the investigation was halted after several witnesses disappeared.

“After 27 years on the force, I’ve never seen anything like it,” explained Sgt. Julius Maloney. “She was wild right out of the gate. She may have been right about how the Hell’s Angels hiding heroin in the daycare, but she sure as shit didn’t need barrel over those suspects. Tugging on her reins was no use. After that, I was up to my ass in paperwork and complaints. We had to transfer her to crowd control.”

According to sources, the Chief was demanding Murney turn in her saddle.

More on LINK.

 

[Journeyman]

Gritty Kingston Police horse transferred to desk duty while Internal Affairs investigates

I thought the original event was funny enough.

Stupid Queen's student (I know, redundant) slaps horse -- horse kick leads to awesome face-plant on Brock St;  only thing that saved it from being a complete Darwin moment was, amazingly,  cab driver wasn't too impaired to stop and not run her over. 


Edit:  removed cab company name....

 

[George Wallace]

 

[expwor]

Baby Planes

All part of the job ... and thank you for flying Qantas!!





A mother and her 5-year-old son were flying Qantas from


Brisbane to Hong Kong





The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his


mother and





asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have


baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"





The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her


son to ask the flight attendant.





So the little guy walks up to the galley and asks the flight


attendant, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats


have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby


planes?"





The flight attendant responded, "Did your mother tell


you to ask me that?"





The boy said, "Yes, she did?.





"Well then, please tell your mother that there are no


baby planes because Qantas always pulls out on time ... and


ask her to explain that to you."

 

[cupper]

:rofl:

 

[George Wallace]

For you who love Terry Tate, here is his Election commercial:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djdzZ76YIQM

 

[George Wallace]

We got STRONGER BEER!

 

[George Wallace]

 

[expwor]

WALKING ON THE GRASS


The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.


The instructor said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you.


Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier.


Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surface like grass or a path."


"Gentlemen, remember -- you're in this together. It wouldn't hurt you to go walking with her.


In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both."


The room became very quiet as the men absorbed and pondered this information.


After a few moments a man at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand.


"Yes?" asked the instructor.


"I was just wondering if it would be all right if she carried a golf bag?"




This level of sensitivity just can't be taught.

 

[dimsum]

Philomena Cunk's Moments of Wonder series on BBC Two is gold.  Think of it like a less-offensive Ali G Show.

https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/3h9cs3/just_found_this_comedy_series_called_moments_of/

First episode:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvpbW7JRu0Q

 

[a_majoor]

Why rescue cats are a bad idea:

 

[jollyjacktar]

A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work.

Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.

The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.

The little boy says, ' Dark in here.'

The man says, 'Yes, it is.'

Boy: 'I have a baseball..'

Man: 'That's nice'

Boy: 'Want to buy it?'

Man: 'No, thanks.'

Boy: 'My Dad's outside.'
Man: 'OK, how much?'

Boy: '$250'

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together.

Boy: 'Dark in here.'

Man: 'Yes, it is.'

Boy: 'I have a baseball glove.'

The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, 'How much?'

Boy: '$750'

Man: 'Sold.'

A few days later, the Dad says to the boy, 'Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch.'

The boy says, 'I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove.'

The Dad asks, 'How much did you sell them for?'

Boy: '$1,000'

The Dad says, 'That's terrible to over charge your friends like that...that is way more than those two things cost. I'm taking you to church, to confession.'

They go to the church and the Dad makes the little boy sit in the confessional booth and closes the door..

The boy says, 'Dark in here.'
The priest says, 'Don't start that shit again; you're in my closet now.'