More and more funnies.. vol: something...

[ironduke57]

 

[CEEBEE501]

Three of the people from my BMOQ last summer got their course dates this week for BMOQ(L)..........They are all pilots.....

 

[HavokFour]

 

[Rifleman62]

This is a yarn:

YARD SIGN
From a guy in Texas :

My neighbor is a "lefty" of sorts (Obama bumper stickers, gung-ho socialized medicine, "guns should be banned", etc.).  So this past spring I put this sign up in my yard after one of his anti-gun rants at a neighborhood cocktail party.   
   
The sign wasn't up more than an hour before he called the police and wanted them to make me take down the sign. Fortunately, the officer politely informed him that it was not their job to take such action without a court order and that he had to file a complaint "downtown" first, which would be reviewed by the city attorney to see if it violated any city, county, or state ordinances, which if there was a violation a court order would be sent to the offendin g party (me) to "remove the sign in seven days."
   
After several weeks he was informed that the sign was legal (by a quarter of an inch) and there was nothing the city could do, which obviously made him madder.   
   
I tried  to smooth things over by inviting him to go shooting with me and my friends at the hunt club but that seemed to make him even more angry.  I am at a loss how to reconcile our long relationship (notice I did not say friendship), any suggestions would be welcome.

 
 

 

[Rifleman62]

Breaking News:

CBC reports: 

Beginning in April 1, 2011 all Canadian gas stations will start showing PORN movies on the screens of the pumps so that you can watch someone else getting screwed at the same time that you are!!

 

[Rifleman62]

Get Fuzzy cartoon strip 15 Mar 2011

 

[observor 69]

The President's Speech


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnxNnJYziMY  ;D

 

[Rifleman62]

      How to sell toothbrushes

The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.

Little Sally led off: "I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher. Little Jenny was next:

"I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events."

"Very good, Jenny," said the teacher…

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath...

Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2, 467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes," said Little Johnny.

"Toothbrushes!" echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?"

"I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny, "I set up a Dip & Chip stand and gave everybody who walked by a free sample."

They all said the same thing, "Hey, this tastes like dog poop!"

Then I would say, "It is dog poop. Wanna buy a toothbrush?"

"I used the government's strategy of giving you something shitty for free, and then making you pay to get that taste out of your mouth.

 

[57Chevy]

Stupid Stunts 1 - Towing a Car Stuck in Snow
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKP-5iodgYY

 

[PMedMoe]

A lady went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen.

The woman asked the cowboy if it was true what they say about men with big feet being well endowed. The cowboy grinned and said, “Shore is, little lady.  Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?”

The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him.

The next morning she handed him a $100 bill.
 
Blushing, he said, “Well, thank ya, ma'am.  Ah'm real pleased. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before.”

The woman replied, “Don't be flattered.  Take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.”

;D

 

[CougarKing]

;D

link

Sarasota Herald-Tribune now hottest place to land a journalism job

By Joe Pompeo | US News - The Cutline – Thu, 24 Mar, 2011 11:41 AM EDT

Journalism is a hirer's market these days, allowing the editors of high-profile magazines and websites to readily poach workers away from equally high-profile competitors. But it turns out that the buzziest media job now is at a 95,000-circulation daily newspaper in central Florida.

The Sarasota Herald-Tribune's listing for a investigative reporter, first posted on March 14, didn't stir a lot of initial interest. But the help-wanted ad got a second wind Wednesday as bloggers circulated it around the web. Mother Jones, for one, dubbed it, "The best journalism job want ad ever ever," suggesting in a Tumblr post that "You should, like, strongly consider applying to work for this guy."

What's all the fuss? Well, here's a snippet of the job description: "Our ideal candidate has also cursed out an editor, had spokespeople hang up on them in anger and threatened to resign at least once because some fool wanted to screw around with their perfect lede."

Tell us more!

The hiring editor, Matthew Doig, then goes on to explain the job's requirements in greater detail:

If you're the type of sicko who likes holing up in a tiny, closed office with reporters of questionable hygiene to build databases from scratch by hand-entering thousands of pages of documents to take on powerful people and institutions that wish you were dead, all for the glorious reward of having readers pick up the paper and glance at your potential prize-winning epic as they flip their way to the Jumble… well, if that sounds like journalism Heaven, then you're our kind of sicko.

Doig's listing may be the toast of the Internet--today, anyway--but will it yield real, live qualified candidates? To judge by an informal sample of other investigative reporter gigs now going begging, it sounds downright enthralling. Here, for instance, is how The Chicago Reporter describes an ideal investigative-reporter candidate: "Must be willing to learn how to use spreadsheets, database managers and mapping software." Or, for political types, here's an investigative post at Roll Call: "The job requires regular production of exclusive stories on money and politics, Congressional ethics, the personal finances of Members and the operations of Capitol Hill." And here's how the U.C. Berkeley Graduate School of Journalism is soliciting applications: "Candidates must have strong organizational skills as well as the ability to self-motivate and work both productively and independently in a congenial newsroom environment."

So how many interviews has Doig already lined up?

"I probably have 15-20 candidates so far," he told Poynter's Jim Romenesko. "This was my first job post. But I took a similar approach when I was looking for a job about 10 years ago. I wrote what you'd probably consider a 'non-traditional' cover letter figuring that anybody who didn't like it would also not like me (and vice-versa). The guy who hired me at the Sarasota Herald-Tribune, Chris Davis, told me he never even read the clips I sent. He just loved the cover letter. And he and I have gotten along about as well as any reporter and editor can, so my strategy must have worked."

If you think you can get along with Doig, you can apply here.

 

[Alea]

How accurate is this one nowadays

Alea

 

[Rifleman62]

Warning, Adult XXX

This man had what he thought was the best tattoo in the world...


...until he went to prison.

 

[zander1976]

 

[nuclearzombies]

Top o' the mornin to all, here's a couple funnies to get you started out today (have a gooder folks!) :yellow:

 

[OldSolduer]

Top o' the mornin to all, here's a couple funnies to get you started out today (have a gooder folks!) :yellow:

I'm keeping an eye on you....I like the cut of your jib....zombie wise....

 

[ironduke57]

Family Feud: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQRMvg5TAl8

> ;D

 

[CEEBEE501]

Whana hear a joke....

Vancouver Island University Faculty Association

 

[Rifleman62]

http://nozzlerage.com/Nozzle_Rage_Video_2.html

Nozzle Rage

Couple of videos. You can skip the msg.

 

[57Chevy]

Three kinds of men  ;D