1. Try to drink lots of water while you drink.....difficult to keep up with this when you are really trashed
2. In the morning/afternoon, when you get up (and feel like you want to die) finnd your local friendly medic and ask him to do/administer the following:
(oh, first make sure he/she's not as hungover as you are)
3. Start an IV, doesn't matter what size, or where. This will be something you will argue about, but thrut the medic......they should know what they are doing.
4. Have them give you a liter or two of Lactated Ringers Solution (Salty water with electrolytes in it) over about an hour.
5. While getting the fluids, have them give you Gravol 50mg IV, a pleasant side efect of this is that it will help you go back to sleep while this is going on, as well as hopefully stopping you from puking more.
6. Have them give you an Amp of Dextrose 50%, as this will help correct your likely low blood sugar levels.
7. Depending on the state of the headache, a couple of Advil might also be appropriate.
8. When this is done, hopefully you can tolerate taking fluids orally. Lots of water and maybe a bit of Gatorade, but not too much as it is rather high in Sodium.
9. Try some bland food like crackers or bread depending on how your stomach is. Hoever like some of the contributors here, I prefer the Steak and Eggs myself.
10. Keep drinking lots of water until you feel better and you have to pee all the time. This is the sign you are adequately hydrated.
Personally i have never seen this approach fail. Then again, I haven't seen many who needed the whole 10 steps. If this doesn't work, perhaps going to your local hospital might be an idea.....as you are really messed up.
Hope that helps.