Wow, and here I was hoping for something to help with the garlic indigestion and help put me to sleep. Didn't find it, so here I go wading into the mire of...whatever people want to call this...
Warpig...I can sort of see your point. My husband is in the military and has been for 18 years now, we have been married for over 11 years, have two children. In December of 2006, I decided to sign up for the military. I started running, taking care of myself and then got a full time job while I was waiting, after being freshly posted, it is always hard to find a new job. So, of course, the running and joining the military took a back seat to life, husband away on training, kids to run around with and a full time job. So, when I finally got my call, almost a year after signing up I was somewhat in shape, I thought, and well prepared for the mental part of course. I expected the yelling, the c^ck and the rest of the crappy stuff that comes from the beginning of BMQ. I got to St. Jean and boy did I fail my express test, OK, I didn't fail too horribly but then you consider that the minimum standard really isn't that high, it was a hard pill to swallow. You don't know what you're getting into physically until you try it and if my husband had warned me I wouldn't have understood or believed the shape I should have been in. I really thought I would be alright on BMQ, hard lesson that I had to learn myself. Yes, I am one of the ones you spoke about, I ended up on RFT. There was no darn way I was quitting though. I climbed the 203 steps, 6 - 8 times a day with all of my kit, as on RFT you do not have lockers on the bottom floor. I finally got all of my push ups, exempted my express test, with stress fractures on my left foot no less. Then, I went on to platoon and graduated BMQ almost 6 months after I originally got there. I left home last November and graduated in May of this year. At no point did I think, "my husband should have looked into this, done that for me or anything else", I was just happy he still picked up the phone to listen to me whimper at night.
At night, on the phone with my husband, was the only time I allowed myself to really whine and wonder if I could get through it. He always knew what to say to get me through, anything from "Suck it up, Private" (boy did he enjoy that), to encouraging me the old fashioned way. I also never thought "poor me, I came ill prepared and it's my husband's fault".
To add to some of your numbers, there were two of us on my original platoon, out of 7 women, who were married to army, I failed the pt test and ended up on RFT, she passed and completed course, now happily divorced, maybe that had a part to play, there were also 50 some men, over 20 of them left the course through, RFT, VR, injury or stupidity. On my second and final platoon I was the only one married to the military, out of 8 women. On my RFT course, there were 2 of us married to military, out of 8 women and 30 some men, we ended up on sister platoons and she graduated as well. The majority of my RFT course were males, 18-25 yrs old we lost 2 women to injury, 1 VRed and we lost approximatly 15 men due to medical, VR, or failing the express test. I don't know what that shows you in relation to your stats. On the RFT course after mine, 2 were married to military, and they have both passed.
As for the testing by PSP staff, here in Greenwood, you can not utilize PSP until you have signed the dotted line and civilians are not authorized to use the gym to run the shuttle test. They are afraid you may get injured, I guess. As for my pushups, I had 15 push ups but not the the standard of St. Jean. There is normally very little time between signing your papers and heading to St. Jean.
Here is my point though, I listened my my husband, I listened to my Dad (army for 20 years), I listened to my grandfather (who took a real sh&Ty trip into Germany), my neighbours (more military) and I made the conscious decision that I would be alright on BMQ physically. Did my hubby know I wouldn't make it through my pt test, I don't know and I won't ask him. Did he encourage me anyway, absolutely! If, on one of our runs, he had told me to speed up or run further, I probably would have told him where to go, because at that point I thought I was doing my best. At that point I probably was. I was in a pretty good place though to help give advice on how to iron, polish boots, etc. So, here's my story...I chose to believe that I would be OK, physically, for BMQ. I was wrong. I ended up on RFT for 3 months and do not consider a moment of that time a waste, if I could do it over again though, I would definitely go in better shape and bypass RFT, it was a HARD program and that extra time away from the kids almost did me in. I got injured on RFT, chose not to tell my staff how bad my injury was and suffer through, so to not end up on PAT platoon. I exempted my pt test and ended up on platoon. I graduated platoon and came home 50 lbs lighter and a whole lot more confident in myself and very proud of myself.
Do you see the common element? I, I, I. I chose, I failed, I worked my @$$ off and I passed. My husband did everything that I asked of him: to encourage me; to believe in me, that I would finish; to put his career on hold so I could do what I really wanted; to take care of our kids and leave me with the peace of mind that everything was OK at home; and, to let me cry to him on the phone when I just wanted to be home and cuddling with my kids and him.
Do some military members let their wives go and really don't care of their success? I am sure there are, are there others who are married to stubborn women who won't listen? I know there is. Are there others who send their wives off well prepared and they still do not complete BMQ? Yes. My success or failures really have nothing to do with my husband and everything to do with me. Are my successes sweeter because I have someone standing behind me, absolutely. Can I push myself further because I know he's there and he loves me, yes. It is the same for other women, married to military or not? I am sure it is. Different women have different support, married to military or not. The success or failure rates of women, married to military or not, really has no bearing on the man or shouldn't. We are grown women and able to investigate things for ourselves. I am sure you know this one... Proper Planning and Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance (we heard that a lot from our staff), I now really know what it means.
So, thank you for your concern for the spouses of military members. I don't want to get confrontational in my post, I am just stating my opinions as I see them, now that I am out of the Mega I am allowed to have an opinion again
I hope your next bunch of recruits, all of them, come fully prepared for what they are embarking; however, we all know that they won't. Some won't like the structure, the yelling, the demoralizing, the pt, etc. Keep doing a good job there though and try to instill in them what we all need to know. Never give up, try your best, never pass the buck, never say never and don't let someone else get blamed for what you did (even though you all suffer for it there). All the other things too, don't point your rifle at anyone, don't take your C7 home for show and tell, etc. I now ramble, I apologize. Take care.
Editted to actually perform a spell check and add a couple sentences to hopefully make more sense. This will teach me to write at 1:30 in the morning.