I think the point of the Sgt's post is that a service member's spouse should show up better prepared and in better shape to take on BMQ than any other recruit, and it simply isn't happening. The serving spouse should be doing everything in their power to prepare their other half for BMQ, from tips and tricks on inspection to physical fitness to instilling mental toughness. Thats the least the serving spouse should be doing. Sending a fat, lazy, mentally frail person off to BMQ with a slap on the ass and a "good frickin' luck, see you in 13 weeks ... maybe!" is NOT ON! Recruits off the street don't do that, they are told what the standard is and its up to them to achieve it, a supportive spouse or family will help them to do that. If they don't, if they show up unfit, unprepared, and unmotivated, they will fail as well, and their family can be just as much to blame as the service spouse's. A service spouse on course can be a HUGE advantage to the other recruits, they know the tricks that might be pulled, they know that the instructors ranting and raving isn't personal. They know its a game. They know that on the course calendar, there is "scheduled c*ck." They know that parade gloss will not destroy combat boots. If they pass on this knowledge it can help the rest of their course mates.
On the other side of the coin ... have you ever tried "training" your wife? Give it a try, get your wife to run till it hurts then keep going. Get your wife to do push-ups till her arms are jelly. She'll tell you to beat it, and stop being so mean. She knows you mean well, but you can't jack your wife like she's a troop. They don't like that. She knows the standard she has to meet, but until she actually gets trained to soldier, you can't train her like a soldier. So, when it hurts, full stop. When her arms are tired, full stop. When her muscles ache, full stop. Thats a far cry from the "do it till it hurts, then do 5 more" attitude most of us carry when it comes to PT. It takes a long time to train someone to the standard required like that.
Once you have your spouse sent off as prepared as they can be, your job still isn't done. You have to support them as best you can, its still a severe culture shock. Encouragement and reassurance are required right through your spouse's QL3 training.