Eye In The Sky said:
So, there is the bottom line. Identifies as a male, but hasn't completed the whole change. Male top half, female bottom half.
Not sure how that equals 'transition complete'.
Hello,
This is my first post on this site and I believe I can speak with some expertise on the subject as I am a serving trans woman. Now I don't normally call myself a trans woman as I consider myself a woman because that is my gender. I have an "F" not a "M" on my military ID, provincial driver license and passport (green and blue). I live my life as a woman having transitioned over a year ago. I dress as a woman, style my hair as a woman, wear make-up (
a necessary evil given my ugly mug ). However, here is the rub, I have not sought nor will I ever seek any altering surgeries or hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Specifically, my transition is complete in the sense I have come as far as I require to be a woman. There is no checklist or specific requirements dictated by others to be considered the gender you identify. Legally I am a woman but physiologically and genetically I am a man . . . confused yet?
Most who have responded to this post are confusing concepts of binary gender description which makes you male or female so long as you have checkmarks in all the right boxes on the list. That is not the case. Perhaps some basic definitions might help clarify:
Transgender: Is an umbrella term for all who experience some form of gender dysphoria. This covers your classic cross dresser who just likes to dress up in various articles of the target gender from time to time to those who have a need to align themselves with the target gender and, all points in between (e.g., gender fluid, gender questioning, etc.)
Transsexual: Is a person who knows they were born as the wrong gender and seeks to align themselves (in whatever way they see fit) to live as the target gender. I am a transsexual in that I was born male but I view myself as woman. This has nothing to do with what is between my legs and everything to do with a sense of self.
Genetic sex: This is predetermined by your chromosomes in which you are either "xy" (male) or "xx" (female). Yes there are variations such as "xxy" "xxx" but, for simplicity I went with the most common. I am genetically male in that no science to date can change that. However, while my genetics are predetermined at conception, that does not mean my gender identity is also fixed and cannot vary.
Physiological sex: This is linked to genetic sex in that your chromosomes and hormones (testosterone and estrogen) will determine what form your body takes on. If you are born genetically male, testosterone is the predominant sex hormone and you will develop male primary and secondary sexual characteristics. Your body mass will tend to be larger, you facial features will be more masculine and fat to muscle content will be more masculine. Yes, some men can appear more feminine (slighter build) but they are still male.
Transsexuals can suffer various levels of dyshoria when it comes to their physiological appearance and can take various avenues to correct that. For example gender reassignment surgery (GRS), breast augmentation/removal, hormone replacement therapy, female facial feminization surgery (male to female). However, this is not a requirement for transition as each has their own level of dysphoria and will seek various avenues to attain a comfort level. In my own case, I am happy with my body as it is. Yes, I am genetically and physiologically male but that is all superficial and I have no need to alter my body via surgery or hormones. Fortunately, I have a slighter frame than your average male and my features are finer but, "
the kid isn't pretty but she accepts that" [
. My dysphoria is body and facial hair (thanks Northern European ancestors) so I have taken steps to have my beard and body hair lasered from my body.
You also need to account that the surgeries you are talking about are very invasive (
Google GRS and you will find detailed description with video should you doubt my voracity ) and depending on the person's health and age can be quite dangerous. HRT is nothing to be messed with either as swapping your hormones can do damage to your body again depending on age. So some trans folks may not be able to seek GRS, FFS, BA or HRT due to health issues, personal choice or financial requirements. While GRS is covered under most Provincial health care - the remaining surgeries can run in the tens of thousands. I personally am in several thousand just for hair removal (not covered by the military or the health care system). So what many term "full transition" here, is sometimes not desired or not possible (medically or financially).
Gender Identity: The last two concepts were all about appearances (i.e., how the person appears to the world) and while dysphoria may require a trans person to correct various aspects of their physiology it is "gender identity" which drives this. This is how the person perceives themselves. I was born male but identify as a woman . . . why is that? I wish I could tell you. Again this has nothing to do with what is between my legs and everything to do with how I see myself. I don't look in the mirror and see a guy, I see a woman. No, not physiologically . . . but still a woman. Gender identity tends to manifest itself quite early but there are generational effects. I knew I was not quite wired like the other boys when I was five but that decades ago in small town Canada and we did not speak of such things so I socialized boy, suppressed, joined the military (combat arms, SOFCOM and now support) to live an uber-masculine life and prove I was all guy. Still I knew there was something wrong and when things went very dark (and I mean dark) three years ago after decades of denial/suppression, I realized I had to transition or cease to exist . . . that is how bad it can get folks. So I transitioned so I can align my sense of self with my gender identity (woman) and have never looked back. My body does not define who I am only how people see me (trans) . . . my sense of self defines who I am (woman).
Now the million dollar question . . . where do I go pee and shower? Well for my daily business I use the women's restroom because folks . . . I am just answering nature's call and that is done in the privacy of a stall. Showering is a different thing as I am cognizant that I am physiologically male and that would make folks uncomfortable (myself included). Surprisingly, men were more upset about me using the male change rooms . . . go figure. However an accord was reached and sometimes that is what it takes, education, compromise and logic.
A few myths I want to put to rest:
(1) Being trans is not a mental illness. It used to be referred to as Gender Identity Disorder (GID) and was in the DSM IV but has since been removed by mental health professionals. Yes, if you come out as trans in the military you will need to go see the medical folks and mental health services. This is to ensure you get a consult with a therapist who specializes in "gender identity issues" to work with you and bring order to what is chaos on a grand scale and is used to assign a TCAT should you decided HRT and surgery is your avenue. Yes, trans folks tend to have higher rates of suicide and depression but it is not caused directly by being trans but second order effects. Imagine being someone you are not for most of your adult life, hiding in the shadows because people think who you are is wrong, perverted, weird, then finally accepting that in yourself, coming out only to potentially loose family, friends, livelihood . . . that will take it's toll on anyone. I reached a very dark point myself, got the help I needed and glad to report I am "five by five" these days. That is not the same realty for many trans folks though.
(2) Gender identity and sexual orientation is not always linked: Just because someone identifies as the other gender does not mean their sexual orientation is also different. Folks, I am married to wonderful woman who supports me and has gone through this transition with me. Specifically, I still like the ladies and always will . . . my gender identity did not change that.
(3) Being trans in the CAF will get you special privileges not given to non-trans folks. NOT TRUE! I have received no special privileges and must adhere to all the same regulations as any other CAF member. What I expect as a CAF member (trans or not) is to be treated with decency and dignity and not be harassed, made fun of, looked down upon or the butt of jokes.
A bit wordy I know but I figured this could provide a trans 101 for those who were confused. Happy to elaborate if you like. [
Cheers