Girlfriends

[IrishCanuck]

I feel that if two people really love each other and want to be together, it will work itself out most of the time.

That is to say, if she really cares about you, she can deal with you going away to training, just like you can deal with her going off to start her own career. If there is a true spark there, it never disappears.

 

[TangoTwoBravo]

Still in high school?  Play it cool.  You'll break up eventually, probably by the time you would be joining the Regular Force anyway if that's the issue.  If its not the military it will be school or career.  In the meantime, enjoy being 17. Lots of time for being a warrior-monk later in Petawawa, so no need to break up just yet.

Win Win.

Next question.

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Plus, if you are going to do any time in CFB Gagetown, you will want to be single on the weekends.  They don't call it "Sweets" for nothin' ! (the other definition of a "target rich environment")  ;D

 

[Chaz]

My little story:
I'm 21, joining reg force infantry. Any time I mention ANYTHING military(even something simple), my girlfriend huffs and puffs and says she doesn't want to talk about it. Even though she says she supports me.  Same thing goes for some of my co-workers.
Whatever. Screw it, I know what I want more than anything, which is to be a soldier and fight for what I believe in.
Maybe they just don't understand, maybe they just watch the media too much. Maybe they just don't have the heart to do the job.
Who knows.
I see a lot of people who get pissed off at trivial things, others who have everything handed to them and keep their hand out for more.
There is more to being Canadian then paying your taxes on time and "being a good citizen"

I know my path, everything else is sexond..err. second
Okay, done my rant  ;D
Hope everything works out.
Chaz

 

[cameron]

I'm not in the military, but maybe you should ask yourself this (and be honest with yourself), if there was a career that she really wanted to follow, would she change her life just to suit you?

 

[BDTyre]

My wife hated the idea of me joining.  Yet here I am, still married and in the reserves.  She's learned to accept it.  She's learned to not necessarily be happy, but at least realize I'm still me and this isn't the end of the world.

 

[GAP]

I had the luxury of marrying a woman who let me do my thing. She always tried to support me, and in the process I tried even harder to support her when her time came. Her support taught me a lot.  We are no longer together, but not because of that. To this day we still care what the other thinks and does, and that's nice.

What I am trying to say is, support counts for far more than you would ever realize. You can do anything you put your mind to, if you know that you are being supported. Good Luck.

 

[GO!!!]

Lots of good responses on here.

I've had more than a few relationships fall apart on the basis of my job. It's no big deal. The first one hurts, but after that, you start to see a pattern, and can pretty easily pick up on who has potential for a second interview and who should be kicked to the curb.

The important thing to remember is that if you take on a girlfriend, if you let her make decisions for you when you are young, you are not in a relationship, you are a subordinate. Women try to control you through the witholding of certain things/activities, manipulating your moods and trying to seperate you from your life (friends etc.) before them. These "bad" women resent the military because it represents a whole world that they have no knowledge of, no control over, and it scares them.

You need a woman (not a girl) who has her own life (job, friends, car, family etc.), then you can look at having your lives co-exist. Her life is not yours, and vice versa.

If this one is showing her true, manipulative colors now, imagine what she'll be like in 10-15 years.

There's plenty of females out there. Make sure you play the field enough when you are young, so when you do get married, there will be no "I wish I had..."

 

[JSR OP]

I left the military for a woman once...  I'll never do that again!  It was probably one of the worst career mistakes I have ever made!  Three years later I started to try to get back in, and it took another two years to get back in! (But that's another story)

 

[NavComm]

If you roll over on this one, you may as well roll all the way over right now and let her drive.  If you give in once, the same bullcrap will happen every time you disagree, and you will end up whipped beyond your wildest dreams.... Sound off like you've got a pair,  there are plenty of girls out there, very few careers as satisfying as ours.....Carry on  .

I'm pretty sure this is the voice of experience talking here.....listen up! +1 and same goes for any 'other half' that doesn't support you in anything you do! Love is supposed to be unconditional.

 

[241]

I have much the same problem although I did not know I had it until after we where married.  She hates the army I almost have to hide all my kit so she don't toss it or something....She even freaks out when she sees me on here.  There have been a few fights when she is screaming about something and threatening to leave and I don't even here her I am too busy picturing the first thing I would do when she walked out the door...Go to my Units Orderly room and sign up for A'Stan...But she always stays...(Not sure if that's a good thing or not ha ha)

 

[zipperhead_cop]

I have much the same problem although I did not know I had it until after we where married.   She hates the army I almost have to hide all my kit so she don't toss it or something....She even freaks out when she sees me on here.  There have been a few fights when she is screaming about something and threatening to leave and I don't even here her I am too busy picturing the first thing I would do when she walked out the door...Go to my Units Orderly room and sign up for A'Stan...But she always stays...(Not sure if that's a good thing or not ha ha)

You may have the order mixed up.  Sign up, then watch her jet. 
I think there are numerous women (not a gender flame, just that is the topic at hand) that don't get the voluntary aspect of the Reserves.  My own wife asked me probably three times to make sure that when I came off the Supp list to active I couldn't be compelled to go overseas.  Probably from so much American coverage of guys getting activated and being forced to go over to Iraq. 
Of course, if I sign up I will chicken out on telling her straight and pretend they got me on a loop hole  ;D

 

[1feral1]

If she cannot acccept your career and lifestyle, tell her to pack her kit. Ya, it sounds cruel, but at the end of the day, one has to be happy, as life is too short. GFs or BFs for that matter, should never try to change anyone.

Find someone who is proud of you in every way. Love should be uncondiitional.

I've got an ex-wife who hated the Defence Force and everything it stood for. She now is water under the bridge long, long, long since passed. 

My current GF (of going on 7 yrs - we live in sin) is everything a bloke could ask for. Before I left she threw a farewell party, inviting neighbours and friends. Of course I did the BBQ, had a 'polar' swim (its still winter in Australia), got pissed, and everyone had fun. She supports me, the ADF and this war fully, and not just because I am a small (very small) part of it.

You'll be happier with the right woman.

Cheers,

Wes

 

[241]

HAHA I have considered doing that (Telling her they got me with a loop hole) but she would probably drive to NDHQ a crawl across someones desk....Although I keep asking my OR to send a letter saying that I am being sent over with no option but to go...They won't do it for some reason...

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Make sure you punt her before she can get her paws into your UN pay.  That should be enough to pay off the divorce. 

Zipperhead_cynic

 

[241]

Yeah definitely would be as we have nothing really and can take all that nothing as far as I am concerned...Except my truck...Need that for work...Everything else she could have...lol ;D

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Then chances are that is what she will want.  Start professing your undying attachment to the Precious Moments figurines to throw her off. 

 

[241]

Ha ha or I could just bag the heck out of it before I left so it was only worth its weight at a scrap yard...If I can't have it then neither can she..LOL >

 

[TCBF]

  "Start professing your undying attachment to the Precious Moments figurines to throw her off."

Did I miss something here?

 

[zipperhead_cop]

All needy women have Precious Moments collections.  Disclaimer:  not all Precious Moments collections are owned by needy women.  However, regardless of who owns them to display them openly is some sort of cry for help.