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Common law not so supportive

I remember when my ex went away to Basic Training and I moved away to go to College. It was hard, I'm not going to lie. I missed that boy more than anything in the world. There were times I wished he would come home, but I NEVER told him that. He missed me and sure we had some tear filled phone calls. But, I was supportive. I knew he had to do his training so he could have the career he wanted. We got through BMQ and got a few days together before he was shipped off to Borden for who knows how long. Again, very hard. I know how it feels to be the girlfriend who just wants her man home. But, I tried my best to just make sure he knew I cared for him, and supported him as best I could. At times I hated the fact he had joined because it had taken him so far away, but I would never have told him that because I wanted him to have the career HE wanted. Just as how he never tried to get me to quit school and follow him to Borden. We BOTH had to do what we thought was best for ourselves, before there could be a WE.

I know from experience doing what was best for ME, was the best decision I ever made. We have since split and are each happy in our separate lives because we both did what was best for ourselves at the time. Sure a relationship is about compromise, but you have to know where to draw the line. You cannot compromise who you are, as it just isn't fair to yourself or her.

Just my opinion, of course.
 
You might have to consider that you will have to chose, the military or the gf, and considering you're only 23, i suggest you pick the military hehe. It's way more rewarding and it won't clean out your house and bank account while you're overseas on a tour. Evil

:rofl: Yeah I have a pretty good idea what I'm going to do. Thanks again guys (and girls)  :)
 
GO!!! said:
More accurately, you are permitted to make the decisions in the house, like what to cook, when to clean etc. as a method of better pleasing your husband.

Anything less would be uncivilised.  ;D

This is a joke right?  Right?
 
HAHA I don't want an apology, I keep my wife in the kitchen cooking for me, or atleast getting me take out, plus she drives me everywhere, brings me diet coke etc.
She's a good wife! >:D

Seriously though, I wasnt offended, so no need to apologize to me.
 
Hot Lips said:
This is the biggest load of BS I have ever read...it isn't funny...it isn't amusing...it is quite offensive and anything less than an apology to the many women on this site will IMO be unacceptable...it makes me nauseous reading it and very, very pi**ed off
HL

Go!!! you don't owe me an apology (speaking as one of the many women on this site)  :boring: Just take off all your clothes and fetch me a beer will ya? OOPS  :-[
 
Hot Lips said:
This is the biggest load of BS I have ever read...it isn't funny...it isn't amusing...it is quite offensive and anything less than an apology to the many women on this site will IMO be unacceptable...it makes me nauseous reading it and very, very pi**ed off
HL
grow a sense of humour. It's a joke, as the little smiley face signifies. You don't like it, don't laugh. Sheesh...
 
"That's what I was thinking."

- But, don't be TOO hasty Jake.  Check out the cottage and the free beer first.

"This is the biggest load of BS I have ever read...it isn't funny...it isn't amusing...it is quite offensive and anything less than an apology to the many women on this site will IMO be unacceptable...it makes me nauseous reading it and very, very pi**ed off"

- If that's the biggest load of BS you have ever read, then you haven't done much reading.  Nothing in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms provides you with a right NOT to be offended.  If you want an apology, by all means extract one for yourself - other women - and men - can make their own decisions.

Tom


 
Hot Lips said:
This is the biggest load of BS I have ever read...it isn't funny...it isn't amusing...it is quite offensive and anything less than an apology to the many women on this site will IMO be unacceptable...it makes me nauseous reading it and very, very pi**ed off
HL

;D <- this is a smiley, denoting humour, or what is usually accepted as the internet equivalent of it.

Also, I find militant feminists to be nauseating - so I demand you stop demanding apologies on behalf of women - you don't speak for anyone but yourself, and your apparent lack of a sense of humour.
 
Since Gos comment was  referred to me.

I just want to say that I was not offended. I actually laughed when he posted it....

But like I said.. I bring home the bacon.. and Hubby is the cook and dishwasher in my house..
Hence why I need a maid when he is on tour.... LOL

Take care everyone...

 
camochick said:
HAHA I don't want an apology, I keep my wife in the kitchen cooking for me, or atleast getting me take out, plus she drives me everywhere, brings me diet coke etc.
She's a good wife! >:D

Seriously though, I wasnt offended, so no need to apologize to me.

HA HA HA.. Well at least I know I make a good wife, even if the marriage is over come August/September. Camo you going to give me a reference after that or what?? I don't want my skills to go to waste.  ;D

Oh, and I wasn't offended. I love humor.
 
Yeah you can have references, or you can stay on as the second wife, but I will rule the house.  >:D
 
TCBF said:
...  Nothing in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms provides you with a right NOT to be offended.  If you want an apology, by all means extract one for yourself - other women - and men - can make their own decisions.

Tom

+1
 
Well you asked for advice,  I think you already know the answer.  (Corny but true)  You know if you really care about her or if you love her.  You know if she can be turned around on the issue and you also know if you feel joining the military is worth it to you if you know the costs.  (There are costs; it says so in the recruiting pamphlet)

I have five separate friends who are dead set against me signing up.  Suddenly I’m not getting invited to parties or movie nights.  I am sad that I’m loosing their friendship but I still am joining.  I’m not going to look back on my life and think “only if I wasn’t emotionally blackmailed by someone (who I may or may not still know)”

My family is really against me signing up,  my sister has convinced them that I will be sent to Afghanistan the day after boot camp.  They’re all way out in Alberta, so to avoid explaining it over and over I just don’t mention it.  I wrote my CFAT yesterday,  my score was such that I qualify for anything I want to do.  I was elated and I wanted to phone my family and tell them,  but it is something that I can’t share with them. 

If it comes down to it,  do you want that kind of situation with your Common law partner?  Silences tend to grow – I am speaking as a person who had a 4 year relationship die a slow painful death. 

So work it out,  one way or the other.  That’s my advice.  :)
 
If you have five friends that won't talk to you then they aren't very good friends - you will meet much better, soon.

REAL friends - if they were truly convinced you were going away to DIE - would help you attempt to impregnate much of the unattached female GTA population.

Your sister is unclear on the concept. You could - and may very well - do a three year contract and never even see Afghanistan.  Maybe you should talk your sister into joining up to look after you?  Her being concerned an all?

;D
 
Well I think I should say I’m trying to join the reserves, in Toronto. So I think that if I wanted to go to Afghanistan I’d have to really prove myself to get to go. (not to mention pull a few hail Marie's in the paperwork to get there) And I made a typo in my previous post, my CFAT mark was such I qualify for anything. (not just the things I want)

I didn’t mean to imply that they wont speak to me because I’m signing up;  it is just they really disagree with the whole idea of an army and are now forgetting to invite me to dinner parties, movie nights in and BBQs.  I think they just need time to adjust, and if they don’t get over it I’ll move on anyways.  I was just saying that if you go off and do what you feel you should do, whatever it be, some people will fade away from your life. I still have the memories of the good times we had together.

And my Sister is convinced that I’ll get sent over there because I’m a language geek, she knows I’ve studied Farsi/Dari. (something that hasn't come up in the recruiting process) I think she would only join up if instead of bombs and bullets we used food aid, hugs and positive reinforcement.

Now as for “real friends” helping me impregnate women… I could say that I don’t need “spotters” to do that, *snicker* I could say I feel having a child is a scared thing I would only do with a deep commitment and true intentions, all of which would be true.  But the truth is I can’t afford a kid right now.  Besides, if I knew for sure I was going to die(before the Visa/Mastercard statements came in) I’d be busy maxing out the old Gold cards!

Oh well this is all premature anyways,  I am not in yet.  :-\
 
You could tell your friends that every country has an army - theirs, or someone elses.

Didn't they have any ancestors at Dieppe or Vimy Ridge?
 
I doubt it,  one is from Syria the other Indian ... the other three are German.  (well from Kitchener)  Besides,  they're great guys - I'm sure I'll be hanging out with them soon enough.  If not, I know the beach parties are starting up,  I'll likely run into them there and we can hash things out.  Who knows maybe they are all just busy.  Oh well,  I have a second interview on June 13th a medical later the same day.  I wonder how long until I find the results - I hope I can get sworn in in time to go to boot camp this summer. (yea I know unlikely, but Meh* I'll go for it)
 
NavComm said:
is it just me or has this thread been totally hijacked?  :-\
who cares? It was answered a while back, it was answered many times in other threads, and this ain't "Dear Abby".
 
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