Heh heh - you guys talk the talk. Well let me tell ya - I've flown the Top Gun mission on my F14 sim - I've got the whole kit - MS sidewinder stick (with realistic backpressure), rudder peddles, throttle plus trim and flap settings - it's practically the real thing - no expense spared.
So here's how it really happens. Listen and Learn. Programmed the sim to fly the same patrol as Maverick over the Gulf of Sidre (don't forget Goose is dead at that point in the movie - and besides I didn't have enough cash to set up a WSO station behind the LZ Boy.)
The Int boys tell us (via the sim menu outlining the top secret mission - cool graphics) that the Libyans are flying Mig 27s and Col. Gaddafi ain't gonna take this provocation lying down in the Bedouin tent - so this is no picnic, boys. I'm on edge - but I like it that way. (Sure I don't mind saying I'm little scared too - anyone who doesn't is a liar.) But hey - that's what I get paid for.
Anyways, I sit at my desk, put aside the cheesy bag, and put the pedal the metal moving the F14 on fast on a patrol line doing CAP at 20 angels just off the Libyan coast. Suddenly I hear a buzz - shyte, bandit! my radar tells me there's a Mig comin' out of the sun - probably at 25 angels. He's got the height advantage! Now I am staying very cool here - pretending I haven't seen him. Int tells us the Libyan Migs are mostly flown by Russian mercs - so they like to get up and personal with the cannon instead of using a missile - some weird russkie code of honour or something.
So I wait, and wait, and wait - seems like an eternity but it's just a few seconds in reality - and then almost on cue the bandit closes in until he's about 100 yards off my tail. Sure as shyte - Mig 27! Now I know what my F14 is capable of - and just as I see him there I says to myself - got ya where I want ya!
I yank the throttle back, drop the flaps and gear and my cocky Mig buddy shoots way ahead of me. Surprise Boris! - I says to myself - coolly painting the Mig by pressing F6 on the key board - getting the lock on him - and then firing off a quick sidewinder courtesy of my right wing. Ain't no scruples about using missiles on my side of the Berlin Wall, says I.
Kaboom! The Mig goes up in a flash - "how about a sidewinder with your borscht comrade" I says. Course I feel a bit guilty - jousting knights of the air and all that - so I circle around looking for a chute -- but nothing. "Nasdrovaya, you were a worthy opponent... you win some - you loose some" I says, and salute the twirling wreckage as it falls into sea with a final, funereal hiss. Just wasn't his day. Could easily have been me.
Anyways nuf' said - I'm not the flying padre and business is business - so it's throttle up along with the gear and flaps and back to the virtual carrier landing (press F8 for accelerated waypoints) - which I kinda screw up because the little flag officer pop up menu tells me I'm too high and I need to go around - but what do those deck-pounding wogs know about carrier flying?
So I slam her on the deck with a quick flourish, drop the ole' tail hook to catch the wire, jamming the throttle into the dashboard, so if I miss I can just go around. I shut the engine down. Time for a gimlet in the wardroom (my rumpus room actually - built the bar myself).
So don't tell me that Top Gun is not realistic - been there - done that.
Cheers, mdh